"Love is when you can be your true self with someone, and you only want to be your true self because of them."Love. How is it that such a short word holds some of the greatest mysteries, complexities, and consist of the greatest worth that can be found in life? Interpretations of it are endless, a myriad of eclectic descriptions that transform and grow daily, by the seconds, by every life altering action... Yet amidst all of the unique differences still lies a concept threaded with familiarity--an understanding felt among us all as to what it means, the power it holds. As we age we discover the many qualities of it that pertain to us, and learn to categorize it in different levels within our own lives.
-Terri Guillemets
Within family lies the most primitive and essential kind of love. If you're lucky you'll also find it to be the longest known form of it. A bond felt the moment you're born though far from understanding its value or the meaning behind it all. You'll absorb it through the very first smiles you view of the people who created you, and soon the others you grow through, the ones who take care of you, nurture you, guide you. If you're fortunate enough, they'll be the people who stay by your side through the shining moments of your life and the darkest. They're categorized by the ones who you can't help but love. You'll fight, and get on one another's nerves through the disagreements you'll be bound to face, but they'll pass as time does, and you'll hopefully realize how precious this kind of love is. Acceptance for each other, and love without need for attraction or masks or fear because you know they've been through it all with you. Ugly days, beautiful ones, dressed up, dressed down, crying, smiling...they're the first ones with hugs and honesty and comfort within the home they create for you through their love that you can always come back to.
Then there's the love uncovered next through friends as bonds are created as the result of shared experiences, and relatable feelings that will emerge and draw you in exposing your opinions, dreams, and view on the life you're still trying to figure out yourself. And you'll uncover trust as you open up to them with the vulnerable hope that they'll be there for you if you're there for them. And no matter how much time passes, you'll carry a piece of them and how they've helped you, or what they've taught you, and you'll love them for that time, and for that new wisdom left within you. Maybe they'll stay with you or maybe they'll just leave imprints upon you you'll always remember in some way, whether it's a little bit more about who you are, or who you aren't.
An important, yet dreadful kind of love that mustn't be overlooked is the "fake, empty love" that we try to force out of people we'll meet along the way. Perhaps a middle school crush, or just a person you try desperately to scratch through the surface of to find anything that feels like the word's supposed to. And you may become exasperated when you realize that it's just not there. We too often are in such a hurry to uncover love that we hold onto these people with the hope that it'll just magically appear one day, that they'll change, or your thoughts about it will. But it won't. Even those naive about love know how it's supposed to feel, what feels right, what has potential. This doesn't mean it's worthless, but it's not love, and hopefully we eventually realize how it's not worth all the time we give it either. Or the effort. And most of all, not worth the emptiness felt within it. It'll tear at our emotions and question who we are, what we want, and what love even is. That's just ourselves fighting for the truth, gasping for pure air so that we may once again break free of this trap if we ever want to find more. It requires strength. But we need to experience this sorrowful imitation, this fraud of the word before we can truly appreciate the real when we find it, or perhaps just that which is already in our lives.
And then there's the most sought after kind of love. The kind that is pure, and real, and one that even the darkest cynic secretly longs for. Pure, head over heels, affectionate love. This kind of love can be the most powerful, most amazing, and at times the scariest, as it plunges you into new feelings and emotions you can't compare to anything else. There are no guidelines, no safety nets, and no sense to it all for it is something beyond our analyzations, structured definitions, and tangible emotions. It's out of our control. When you enter into love, you slowly open up your heart and soul to that one other person and trust them to treat them well. Everything's exposed--the most vulnerable state you can be in. And as exhilarating as that breeze around our bare selves is, its power scares us. We may shiver and flinch as that person tries to understand what they're seeing, that new state of ourselves that even we can't help but observe. It's a whole new reflection and there is no hiding. What we must learn to do is to face it, embrace it, and cherish it while we can. Because it's in this open state that we can transform into the most beautiful image of ourselves...if we allow it.
Photo by: Steven Meisel, Vogue 2009
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