The enigma of ourselves, an everyday conundrum when you think about it. Picture yourself as a myriad of little puzzle pieces. The background's set at birth. You're given a pattern of genetics--a personality all your own, and a being of substance. But who you are can be transformed within a second, your insides constantly molded and painted. Most of the time you can't notice it in one another until you really observe, or watch someone you know so well slowly transform--their bodies the same, yet somehow unrecognizable to you. Or maybe it's even yourself in the mirror. But what if the way we saw one another was changed? What if we could see each person before us as a composition of puzzle pieces? Each characteristic and experience displayed through a kaleidoscope of colors and shapes over our primitive pattern that is embedded to our core. And what if we could wash away certain ones we felt were out of place or unwanted?
If this was reality, we'd quickly notice that a lot of those pieces, and a lot of those colors were from our friends and people we've met throughout our lives. Some add that touch of color that makes you question how it was never a part of you to begin with. Classic. A part of you you'll always smile upon. Others you can't erase fast enough, but no matter how hard you scrub, there's always a faded imprint of a reminder that you'll occasionally catch glimpse of and wonder how you could ever let it affect you, change you. Graffiti never meant to stain you, taint you, break you. And some leave scars, harder to cover, more difficult to move on from, to stop stressing and obsessing over. But you recognized it, you snapped out of it, and alas just when you thought it'd always catch your eye, your focus, your mind--you found strength. Strength within and insight as to the mosaic of yourself that you envisioned...the one you could be proud of, the one that you knew represented the true you. And that strength allowed new colors to form, new shapes and fresh beauty to take hold of and allow you to continue along the way you know is true to yourself. We can't always know that final image.
Like mentioned earlier, we're all puzzles with no set picture, kaleidoscopes over a foundation. There's no perfect arrangement to the pieces, and each shape seems to change at different times. But the most important part of this is to only take pieces from others. I know from experience that I contain an eclectic group of friends, and I always have. When people sometimes look at who I am and what I value, they question the selection of people in my life. But one thing I've realized is that sometimes the pieces you want to become a part of you are found in the most unlikely places and the most unexpected people. You can't choose it, it just happens. Sometimes you're just meant to find that hidden part of someone that you can relate to, respect, or want to understand more of, whether you help them or they help you--probably both will occur. The most important part is to just find those bits you adore and make them your own in you own array of character. If you take too much and allow them to blur your lens, you'll lose sight of your self. You'll hardly be able to see that original pattern of yourself anymore. But at the same time, you have to find those hidden treasures in others when you're meant to because you don't want to just have the original dress laid upon you because how exciting would that be? You'd never learn, or grow, or shine as much as you could.
You must use those gems to decorate yourself, not to overtake yourself. Make them accessories to your souls. And you're most likely going to have to earn the ones most valuable to yourself, good from good and good from bad. Because most of those come from patience and time. And while all this is true, some people can't seem to always find that strength, they allow themselves to become immersed in others, overtaken by their stamps upon them. Instead of taking pieces, they allow themselves to lose sight of who they are behind all of the accessories now weighed down upon them. It's so important not to do this either because it's the times that you let the graffiti overtake you, or small parts to become big parts that don't work with your picture anymore, that you become tangled in it all, and need to fight it away or back to its place even harder. And not everyone has the strength to, we all lose it at times, so take caution when you allow people to become a part of you, how much you allow, and when to know to erase some away. It's all about experimenting and learning and envisioning. But you've gotta have faith in who you are and who others are or you'll never allow anything more beautiful to be created either.
And at the end of the day, everyone wants that masterpiece of themselves, a masterpiece created through imperfections, and a kaleidoscope of truth, personality, and beauty. Be honest with yourself about what it is you want to look like as that puzzle, and build up that strength and the good within you to hold on tight to when you feel like being weak or you lose direction as to where you want to go. No one has the answers, but everyone has the possibility for greatness, and this can only truly be achieved when you find that perfect balance within yourself and others. Take a piece from all you meet, allow beauty to be painted upon you with a color of others mixed with your own; the creation will be beautiful. And when you find that it's not quite right, turn that lens around, rearrange some pieces, toss some graffiti to the side, and take another look. There's always time to readjust, and there's always beauty to be found and created. But never allow the pieces that do belong to be covered by those that don't for too long because if they were placed there by someone else, they could break away some pieces, and be harder to find again. Always hold those pieces dear. Those and your foundation. As for the rest, have fun with your life and trying to figure out your puzzle day by day.
There's only one key to the enigma to ourselves: To always evaluate your image, piece by piece, and the self as a whole. The rest you just have to have faith, and trust that it'll all fall into place as you go along. Trust yourself. Just make sure your image is something you can love, something you can look at and smile upon. Trust me, it's a good feeling when you get there. Make your own definition of aesthetics. Hold strong in the artistic talent instilled within your life.
"Michelangelo said the best way to judge the essential elements of a sculpture is to throw it down a hill and the unimportant pieces will break away. Sometimes life is like that. It tosses us down a hill. But when we reach the bottom and only the important things are left, that's when our vision clears. That's when we hold on tight to what we know, while hope stirs inside us. It's all a matter of perspective."
-Everwood
Photo by: Steven Meisel, Vogue
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